I’m a laughing gnome

The website is coming along fine, there’s always going to be more to work on, but the only major part left is the photography section. It’s just going to be filled with urban exploration stuff. You can take a look at http://www.phawken.com

I’m never sure if I should put the names of the places with the photographs (I can’t even remember half of them). There are lots of dedicated urban exploration sites out there with detailed histories of places like Hellingly Hospital, so it’s not something I really want to repeat.  When I was in America I found out there were tourist places you could go, and for the low, low price of $200 you get the privilege of walking around an abandoned mental hospital, you don’t even have to run away from guard dogs or crack heads; takes the fun out of it if you ask me.

 

The website is currently undergoing a major update, and so some things might go down for a little while.

 

On the bright side it’ll all look super-pretty when it’s done.

Enter title here.

I haven’t updated in a long time because I spent the past month in America. I saw my wife for the first time in a year. I saw a man called Gaylord. I saw a transvestite dressed as an eskimo. I saw a man who injects testosterone into himself and cuts hair off his head and glues it into holes in front of his ears. I saw the world’s #1 Johnny Cash impersonator. I saw all the presenters from Top Gear. And I saw more mullets and women with black eyes than I ever have in my life.

Sebastian Horsley is dead. Frank Sidebottom is dead, Dennis Hopper is dead, Dio is dead, Malcom McLaren is dead, Gary Coleman is dead, Robert Culp is dead, Frank Frazetta is dead, Corey Haim is dead, Peter Graves is dead, JD Salinger is dead.

2011 is going to be really boring.

fiksed

• Okay… I managed to get the email fixed and working again. I am actually able to receive people’s emails now.

• Lots of fun things are happening! I can’t explain any of it yet though, but it could be very interesting, it could be an absolute disaster, I dunno. Either way it will be an experience.

emayul

• If my calculations serve me correct, there is now a 20% chance that I’ll receive any emails sent to me.

• When I was a kid I was desperate to go to Asterix Land.

• I was thinking of buying a Cyberman helmet, but I don’t think it’ll fit over my big head.

nieus

The website went down for a short space of time on Saturday, this was due to an explosion at the internet house (I think that’s how this thing works), although the website is back up now, I still haven’t regained access to emails and the like, so if you have sent me anything, I can’t yet read it.

Annoyingly, this crash coincided with a steep rise in viewing figures.

Anyway, here’s a drawing of people and events in milton keynes:

vidya gaem

Okay, I finally decided to upload the game I’ve been working on. I’ve been sitting on this for two weeks before I came to the conclusion that I really can’t find any problems to iron out.

Download it here.

I haven’t updated this blog in a while. “Why?” I hear no one ask, well it’s because I’ve spent a week dying from the flu. On the fun side though, having the flu right in the middle of a heatwave at least allowed me to spend my time lying in bed pretending I’ve got malaria, which is far more exotic…. that’s at least something to do, right? It beats being awake at 4am with my fever dreams about being attacked by murderous lilliputians who have conspired to murder exactly 100 different people across the nation at precisely the same time through a combination of poisoning and dehydration.

When I wasn’t going absolutely nuts I was flicking through old photographs in my spare time. Here is a few photographs from a trip to Belgium I made a few years ago. I can’t remember how I made the decision to go to Belgium, but it was certainly striking just how different the attitudes towards both urban exploration and community in general are. It was also shocking how bad my photographs are, and how I can go on holiday to take photos whilst only taking 2gigs of memory with me.

I want to go to Pripyat and have a look around, instead of sitting here staring at photo editing software. A trip to Pripyat is now one of my goals in life, before they clean the place up, or it becomes full of tourists, or the sarcophagus fails and half of Europe turns into a fireball. I want to go, despite being told that it’s so radioactive that you can only spend two hours in the place at any one time. I’ve heard conflicting reports from several different people who all claim to have visited. Personally, I don’t mind a little bit of radiation because I’m curious about the place; which makes me wonder if I’d take a look at the sarcophagus given the chance. I mean, if you go near it it’ll kill you, but you’ll be one of the few people to ever see the thing! And if you refused your chance then your curiosity would never be satisfied! You’d go to your grave without seeing the thing!

Anyway…. After I recovered from the flu, I’ve spent the time learning to code. I thought it would be best if, before I started making Dixinmouf, I actually knew how to make a game. I’m both terrible at maths, and at coding, but I’ve almost managed to make my first game, and it’s a great feeling to see something evolve from a pile of crap into something quite beautiful, that feeling is short lived however, as it always turns out to be a big buggy pile of crap, but hopefully it’ll be finished within the next few days.

Also; a long, long time ago I noticed I had over 10,000 hits, I was supposed to mention it here, but I kept forgetting all about it. I imagine by now it’s increased considerably. For some reason I’m popular in Argentina and Russia.

And… just before I go… thanks to the wonders of the internet you can search Facebook to find every single post anyone has made that features the words “I’m not racist, but…”

more urban exploration stuff

I’ve posted a few more old urban exploration photographs up on my flickr account, mainly from an abandoned animal testing facility this time. I’m pondering sticking them all in a small book.

My flickr account.

I guarantee it’s only a matter of time until some lunatic tries to make their own human centipede.